Apparently I was feeling silly and thought I was SO clever.
Read MoreWhen You Know He’s Reading Your Shit
I have so much guilt for what I did to my kids…
Read MoreDrunk Blogging
Apolofgies for thre typos.
Read MoreBooty Calls and Break-up Sex
Ah, the pangs of regret. But little victories.
Read MoreAmbien and Alcohol (Part 2)
Stream-of-consciousness self-discovery.
Read MoreAmbien and Alcohol (Part 1)
In which it gets real ugly… and real sad. It is absolute hell re-reading these sometimes.
Read MoreHow to Recover from a MAJOR Blow to the Ego
“No, it was much worse... he told me that I have gained weight since we got together… but it doesn't bother him as long as he doesn't look.”
Read MoreBonus Blog: Versions of Me
There’s a version of me locked away in my head
That’s always on time, never has moldy bread,
She never procrastinates, never postpones,
And always pays cash for all that she owns.
She showers daily and is always well-spoken,
None of her shoe heels or jewelry is broken,
She’s good in the kitchen and rarely eats out,
Never over-imbibes when alcohol is about.
She knows what she wants, she’s confident and strong,
And she goes after it like she has all along.
She contributes the max to her 401k,
And she’s proud of the state of her Roth IRA.
She’s involved in the community, she volunteers,
And her credit card payments are not in arears.
She works out and meditates and writes out her story,
Just to help others, she doesn’t want glory.
And yet, here I am, feeling none of these things,
The version of me that I see only stings,
I had “so much potential” but not much to show
For my forty-plus years, and surely I know…
That I’m late, I’m distracted, I’m sad and in debt,
Sometimes dirty and awkward and my heels need reset,
I spend too much money on restaurants and junk,
And on most occasions I’m probably drunk.
I’m lazy, I’m scared, I’m selfish, and tired…
And one thing’s for sure - the milk is ALWAYS expired.
It was, in fact, the Beginning of the End (part two)
A pending breakup letter I never sent.
Read MoreIt was, in fact, the Beginning of the End (part one)
A pending breakup letter I never sent.
Read MoreIs This the Beginning of the End? (part two)
Let me get dramatic for a minute.
Read MoreIs This the Beginning of the End? (part one)
Oh HELL no.
Read MoreHow to Update Your Blog Followers
General update of the goings on.
Read MoreHow to Count Your Blessings
Physical signs that something might be amiss.
Read MoreThe Ultimate Dream Bundle (Part 2)
A Quiet Place before it was cool.
Read MoreThe Ultimate Dream Bundle (Part 1)
And what do you think THAT was all about?
Read MoreHow to Keep Your Sanity
Lie down on the couch…
Read MoreWays to Conquer Big Projects
I am a mosquito’s favorite meal.
Read MoreHow to Provide Excellent Customer Service
Just give ‘em a little ass. Wait, what?
Read MoreWhat Dreams Can Tell Us About Ourselves (Part 2)
Death in dreams…
Read More